What is love?
‘Cause the more I keep walking along the path we call “our love”, I stray myself.
I feel lost.
Tell me, is this really love?
It feels like chains binding me.
Tell me, will you be there?
Like a kid, you need more attention.
I need to hide every emotion.
I want a goal,
Not another obstacle.
I need support,
Not someone to court.
What is love?
How long has it been since we last kissed? It hasn’t been that long, I know. Feeling, however, take over me and I feel the need to embrace you. I want to be close to you And feel safe in your arms. I fell in love with you, unfortunately. Fortunately, I met you. Though, the sadness in all this reverie rests in how I cannot meet you. Again, I cry, trapped in this darkness. Where are you, love? Where are you, my knight? We are young and in love. My words hurt you like knives as I don’t know how to convey my feelings. Let this words that have been written out reach you, as you are the one who can pull me out of this picture. I want to once again…feel you.
Today, my boyfriend and I got into a fight. To make it clear, we have a long-distance relationship and have seen each other three times in the year and a half we’ve been dating. Truth to be told, I’m getting desperate and way too anxious because we’re in different continents. He’s in Europe while I’m in America.
We fought because, well…there isn’t really a reason. It’s just that I’ve been mad at him the whole day. The thoughts crossing my mind are thoughts of him not missing me as much as I do. It’s been quite long since we’ve kissed or held hands. I barely see him when we talk using Skype. His laptop’s camera is a piece of crap, and every time we talk I see him for about five minutes, then nothing. Our responsibilities makes it hard to have time and talk. And when we do have time, well…we watch funny videos on YouTube or watch a movie or something. It’s becoming a routine.
As a woman, I like the cute and sweet words he used to call me or the nice comments about my figure or the forever-in-love poems he used to tell me. Now, when we talk he tells me that he loves me, but nothing more. I made a mistake when I read the messages he used to send me. For heaven’s sake, he used to cry whether said he missed me and how he wanted to marry me.
Relationships are hard, not only romantic ones but every single other one, too. We have to deal with people, be careful not to hurt their feelings or something. I understand, still…there are times when I wish I could tell him how I feel and what I need without him getting irritated because he thinks I don’t appreciate what he has done.
I really had to write this down, since I needed to let it out.
I wait for you.
Time stops and leaves sports tainted by loneliness.
It hurts to look back,
You’re not whom I fell in love with.
The way you talk to me,
The words that come out of your lips,
They are not the same.
We’ve been turning pages,
But what about our sentiments?
I miss you,
But I wish you would too.
Where’s the man who made me laugh?
Where’s the man who made my heart beat?
Where are the phrases that made me live?
But you don’t answer.
Where are you, my lost lover?
Diversity was created for the sole reason of having a crazy mixture.
Ice and fire,
A warm word,
A cold touch;
Loving and hating,
Trusting and suspecting,
Though it’s only when I look at whom we’ve become that I truly understand.
To make a puzzle you need those parts to fit.
For that matter, they can’t be the same.
There is, however, something unfair.
A piece will always be eating the other one away.
One of the pieces will always overpower the other.
Between us, according to that endless jigsaw,
Am I the one consuming you,
Or are you the one overwhelming me?
June 11, 2012 at 3:32 PM (Thoughts, Uncategorized, writing)
Tags: chains, feelings, freedom, friendship, human-rights, inner demons, love, mind, people, poetry, selfish one, sincere, thoughts, writing
There are times when I feel atrophied by the chains that bind my emotions.
Are we really free to express ourselves without being judged?
Can we tell the person we trust the most our fears?
It’s like a burning fire,
A flame that eats my confidence away.
I thought, as a kid, that we were free beings, but turns out we really aren’t.
We live in a society and have to deal with others. Not only their reactions but their thoughts, their feelings and also inner demons. We have to choose into being the one that listens, the one that accepts, and the one that understands and supports the other, or become the selfish one that doesn’t value the person in front of you.
My words are tied to other’s judgment,
My judgment bound to other’s thought,
My thoughts restrained by other’s words,
So I ask, once again, am I really free?